Sorry it has been soooo long :/ 5 months since my last post here :( A quick run down of what has transpired since then: I've graduated, went on holiday to Germany & Switzerland, got a boyfriend, started my first grad job, moved to a new city, got dumped, struggled through work, considered quitting my job, questioned life.....you get the picture I hope!
So during these exciting times there has been a mixture of highs and lows and valuable life lessons and experiences. I've now been working for 4 months almost, so I thought that it was a good time to post a reflection. I'll give each one a stress score from 0 to 4
July stress levels = 0 very low
When graduating one feels a big sense of pride (and slight embarrassment from the big deal your parents make out of it). The world is your oyster! But university, some of the best years and memories, are behind you. Everything has changed, you get a pang of loss, but a sense of accomplishment heavily outweighs that.
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| The great hall |
Luckily I had secured a job prior to graduation so I sat my arse at home for the whole summer with only my parent's nagging to worry about, this was broken up by a 10 day holiday to Germany and Switzerland. If you'd like me to blog on that please comment below!
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| Basel Altstadt (Basel Oldtown) |
Prior to working I went to visit the lad who I had been exchanging texts and calls with since May and we had a wonderful weekend in Scotland fireworks and all that jazz lol. He catered for me, looked after me, and was good at all the important things...if you catch my drift ;) He even brought up the 'relationship conversation' So I started work with a spring in my step and very little anxiety.
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| Birthday Jokes #They're too young for me |
Work was pretty slow paced I was still chatting to this guy and making plans for a 2nd visit. It was also my birthday this month so I had the usual I'm getting old moan everyone has past the age of 21. During the later weeks of the month I started questioning whether I really liked the company or the work I was doing...pretty ridiculous right??? Especially since I'd only been working a few weeks. Looking back on it now I was being too impatient.
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| Fish and Sticky Rice |
Wonderboy calls and dumps me...out of the blue....I am hating life: anger, depression, loneliness. I haven't made many new friends at this stage and my job is nakering me out. I don't know wtf I'm doing and there is a lot of pressure, expectation, travel, politics that is adding insult to injury.
November stress levels = 4 high
I want to quit my job! I want to jack it all in. The travelling is at a high I live on trains and plains and I'm never in my flat. Hotels, public transport and different offices are my new home :( I am missing wonderboy and my uni friends. I go to visit a few to get some TLC and also make a trip home. This is good but as to my time in transit...
December stress levels = 5 unhealthy
I have bad stomach pains. I go to the doctor as my stomach pains are becoming unbearable and I'm having trouble eating. I've given myself severe indigestion from all the stressing out, coffee and alcohol (work socials). I get good feedback at work, I give a presentation to my line manager and the head of engineering and they're thoroughly impressed with what I've been doing. My team leader also rates me and says he's happy with my performance.
SO WHAT WAS I STRESSED ABOUT???????
I've realised that I need to learn to let things go and accept that I don't have full control. Take a chill pill and let God take control. Sorry if it seems like I just threw this on the page. Let me know what areas you would like me to go into more detail and I'll make more posts.
Thanks so much for reading
Fi
xoxoxo
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